The well trodden paths of the mind.

She hands me an old A5 notebook. Other than the yellowing of its pages, it’s surprisingly un-weathered by time.   She is smirking at me as if there is something hidden somewhere inside it. I page through it, taking a while to recognise myself in the handwriting. A page is dated Wednesday, 15th May 1997; notes…

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Mindfulness as more than a method

In my early 20’s, in a quiet fever to understand my own anxious self, I came across a book, Going to Pieces without Falling Apart by buddhist psychiatrist Mark Epstein.  I can recall it having a profound effect on how I understood the workings of my own mind.  Here I am, rereading it in my 40’s,…

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The Keeper of Tears

  She’s sitting on the precipice Of everything She never allowed Everything she could still be. Perfectly pulchritudinous In who she already is.     She likens staying to being An ascetic And, in her resolve to leave She rolls her reluctant tears into a tissue Folding them away, Filling the cup’s inevitable emptiness.  …

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Confessions of a Love Addict

I don’t think you can plan a life. I became a psychologist by mistake. I had actually planned to be an artist of sorts. Maybe, in some ways, I still am an artist. I hope so. What I do requires the ability to spontaneously respond to each person’s struggles, authentically. That’s surely done best when…

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Composting Life

I was sitting with a 91 year old man yesterday morning. He tried to eat his breakfast as his wife kept pampering him, reminding him to tuck his serviette into his collar. “Here my darling, let me do it, it just keeps falling out and you’re going to ruin your clean shirt.” His long body…

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Living despite tears. Living to the point of tears.

I’ll tell you a little known secret and perhaps save you some disappointment: the idea that psychology can cure the pains of the human heart is mythical. For this reason I envy the achievements of modern medicine. Through good science and thorough practice it has managed to successfully cure many of the physical ills we…

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